F*ck you, Haiku

It is with great pleasure that I announce a new installment of the Landing Pad! A daily haiku brought to you for your enjoyment. Each day,17 syllables of  insightful perspective, reflection on nature, and the address of common problems our society faces today whether it's ugly chicks, light pollution, or penis envy (that's you, not me). Even a stab at Doo Doo Mamas of America! I promise you won't be let down. However, if you are a true connoisseur of prose and poetry and manage to stumble across the haiku series you'll probably be little more than slightly nauseous in which case I'd recommend that you pop some Skittles and chill the fuck out. Really excited about this...no, the picture is not entirely relevant, I simply hoped to evoke a similar level of disgust with the series to come.